Dave's book review for Tiny Experiments

I was going to give this a middling review because I felt like the end of the book was fairly weak and left the whole thing somehow less than the sum of its parts.

But now that I’m writing it, I’ve changed my mind.

First of all, even a less-than-spectacular book in self-improvement usually gives me lots of ideas, so I usually get something out of reading them.

And secondly, when I opened up my e-reader and started reviewing my highlights, I was surprised at how many great little insights I’d noted.

If nothing else, reading this book was 100% worth it solely for the concept of making a "pact" with yourself.

As Le Cunff explains, a pact is not a goal (but could support one). It’s about showing up for a finite period and seeing if it works.

A pact is specific and achievable. It’s for a set period of days. You can quit the pact or you can extend it indefinitely if it’s working, but having a number of days for the pact makes it something you can push towards.

I gave myself one. It’s something I’ve been struggling to achieve for years. I set it for four weeks. I’m in the middle of my third week now. It’s going amazing. I believe having the four week target made a big difference.

"Beware of the maximalist brain when choosing your pact."

For a completely new and untried thing, Le Cunff recommends a ten day pact.

I love this quote:

"Confidence isn’t a quality we are born with or something that magically happens; it’s build through action."

That’s remarkably similar to my favorite definition of wisdom!

Decide what you’re doing now and give it full attention.

See also intentionality as described by Cal Newport in Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life…​.

Break out of autopilot and really think about what you’re doing.

Very related: Do One Thing at a Time!

I thought the chapter on procrastination was very interesting. "Procrastination is not the enemy."

She invokes The Two Arrows analogy from Buddhism (see my book review for In the Buddha’s Words: An Anthology of Discourses from the Pali Canon and This too shall pass) to describe how we make ourselves more miserable when we procrastinate:

The first "arrow" (pain or damage) is the procrastination itself. The second arrow is our emotional reaction to the procrastination. We beat ourselves up and make ourselves miserable with guilt and anxiety. (Yup!)

She says that procrastination is what happens We’re not listening to what our brains and bodies are telling us when we try to push through some barrier on a task. It’s "poor teamwork between our emotional and our rational selves."

Resistance as evidence: Once the actual underlying problem is addressed, procrastination usually disappears on its own. In fact, if you’ve addressed it completely, you might find it hard to not jump immediately into the work because now it’s exciting again. (I totally confirm this. Not always, but sometimes!)

Don’t be judgmental.

She cites the research of Hugo M. Kehr and his formulation of:

Is there some way you can make the task make sense, exciting, and do you need to acquire the right tools or skills?

Easier said than done, for sure, but helpful. Especially the non-judgmental listening to yourself part.

Even joyous occasions (birthdays, holidays) can be disruptive if they mess with our sense of control and our role in the world.

Great quote:

Yes! I have a really hard time explaining this to anyone who isn’t also driven by personal projects and goals. So it’s always nice to see someone else express the same idea.

Active acceptance: Good.

Resigning acceptance: Bad.

The good path is between abandoning hope and blind can-do positivity. (Again, the Buddhist notion of neutrality appears in the wild.)

Keep showing up!

But also relax your grip a bit.

Intentional imperfection: Perfect things are static and dead with no room for improvement. This reminds me of Stewart Brand’s How Buildings Learn. TODO: link to that when I re-read it and write a review.

For my fellow personal website people (see my What should a personal website be?), here’s a great quote by Carl Jung: